


Challenge 28: Let's Talk Once (Princess Gossip)

by sidhe_faerie



Series: Once Upon A Land Challenges [24]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-23
Updated: 2013-08-23
Packaged: 2017-12-24 09:22:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/938277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sidhe_faerie/pseuds/sidhe_faerie





	Challenge 28: Let's Talk Once (Princess Gossip)

Princess Gossip  
(I wrote this as my role play character spreading gossip. I hope that’s OK.)

I found out about a boy with a book from some rumors going around. It seems this book had stories in it about some of my friends. One friend in particular ‘Like the Driven’ or as we called her in Princess circles, LTD. 

Oh that’s right you don’t know me. I’m Princess Gaylen Endora of the Tuathe De Danaan. I’m from the Southern Court to be exact. I’m a Questing Faerie Princess. I’ve been on a few adventures in that weird forest they come from.  

So let’s get back to the boy with the book. He had stories in there of some of my friends: LTD, Dingy, Snores, Chopsticks and Smudge. I shouldn’t forget LTD’s BFF Furry and Furry’s Grandma, Fuzzy. 

We Princesses love out nicknames. They call me ‘Pinky’ by the way. 

Most of the stories are true but some well not so much. Dingy only reads books for the naughty pictures. Furry is a vegan. Smudge has a shoe addiction. Don’t tell them I told you.

The stories are about the time they lived in that weird forest before they moved to that awful place that is so cold all the time. It’s so cold it makes you want to wear panties. 

Some Evil Chick with mommy issues cursed them and that is where they ended up. If you ever meet her mother, Heartless, you will understand immediately. Evil Chick’s mom is like that one with the wire hangers. Oh and Evil Chick was married to LTD’s dad.

Why couldn’t she send them to Florida? 

Speaking of the cold, faeries hate the cold that is why Dust and Wingy are always so bundled up. I can’t figure out how they hide their wings but they must be under there somewhere. I just use a wool cloak.

Dust is the one in charge. She is older than my grandmother but tell her I said that. She is the one that picked out the blue uniforms. 

Wingy has a thing for the short grouchy guy that hangs out with those six other short very peculiar guys.  He’s one of LTD’s friends. 

The book isn’t just about the Princesses. There are other people in there too. There are loads of stories from when they lived in that weird forest

The tree chopper guy who has a problem with his parenting skills lost his kids in the woods that one time. He’s in there. 

That nice old toy guy with his little wooden kid is in there too. He fixed a clock for me once. They have a big fish story that will scare the dust off your wings 

Who am I forgetting? Oh right! 

Barnacle and his scurvy buddies from that place where no one ever gets old are in the book too. They hang out with Jif on the island and Jif’s gang of delinquents. 

Somehow Barnacle ends up in the cold place too. Poor guy. On the bright side he probably won’t stay cold long, if you know what I mean.  

One story in there is about how LTD met her guy, Hunky. He is good with a sword. I think that was why she married him. They got married and had a little girl. They sent her ahead in some magic armoire with the little wooden kid who wasn’t wooden at the time. 

You would think they wouldn’t want anyone to read this book because of all the horrible parenting skills it talks about. I digress. 

Well Ducky, LTD and Hunky’s daughter grew up and she is the mother of the boy with the book. Her Baby Daddy is Briquette who is the son of the Straw Spinning Evil One. 

Then come to find out Dingy is in love with the Straw Spinning Evil One. They even shacked up for a while.

Then I heard that SSEO’s ex had a thing with Barnacle and Barnacle tried to adopt Briquette. Well Briquette had run away so where else was he going to live?

But wait, it gets weirder. 

The Evil Chick with mommy issues adopted Ducky and Briquette’s kid but no one knew whose kid he was at the time. She adopted her own step great grand kid!

And I thought I had strange family tree. 

So I told all this to my sister and she told me that everyone knows about it already because it’s on this thing called ‘television’. I’m sure she’s right about that she knows everything about everything but in a good way. 

I wonder if they know……..   


End file.
